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3 Important Lessons to Teach Your Children for Long Lives
“Do you want your children to die young?”
That’s how a minister introduced us to the third item on this list. It’s a ridiculous question, because no one wants their children to not have a full, long life. But it made us think about lessons you should teach your children and how they might affect their success in life.
Parents have pretty distinct responsibilities before God for training and teaching their children. I am not going to claim that these three lessons are the only things we should teach them. I will say most of the other lessons they must learn can probably be distilled into these three, much like Jesus distilled the Law and Prophets into two commands. (Matthew 22:34-40)
Today, I want to share three lessons that specifically promise long life when they are learned well.
1. Teach Your Children to Love God
“Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore… With long life I will satisfy him, And show him My salvation.” Psalm 91:14, 16
Loving God above all things is the main lesson of the Bible. It’s benefits are many, but long life is listed among others in Psalm 91.
In Matthew 22, Mark 12, and Luke 10, Jesus references Deuteronomy 6:5 when He says the greatest commandment is:
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.”
The best way to teach your children to love God is by example. When we love God first our children will see Him as a loving Father and want to love Him, too. His goodness will lead them to repentance (Romans 2:4) and his kindness will show them the riches of His grace (Ephesians 2:7)
“As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. John 15:9-10
Your genuine love for your Father in heaven will also motivate you to obey Christ’s commands, which will make you a parent whom your children will want to imitate.
2. Teach Your Children to Obey
My son, do not forget my law,
But let your heart keep my commands;
For length of days and long life
And peace they will add to you. Proverbs 3:1-2
Obedience requires submitting your will. That’s not something any of us likes to do. However, it is essential for a successful life. Following the rules of your household lays a foundation for keeping God’s commands, which Proverbs 3 says will give long life.
Romans 1:30 and 2 Timothy 3:2 both list “disobedience to parents” with the characteristics of the ungodly. I know of children who died young because they did not obey their parents. Their tragic deaths were direct results of their refusal to submit to their parents’ instruction. God considers disobedience to parents a capital offense, and he holds the parents responsible to “put away the evil from among you”. (Deuteronomy 21:18-21)
“To obey is better than sacrifice” is what Samuel told Saul when he followed his own will. (1 Samuel 15:22) We need to teach our children the same concept. Obedience must be willing, immediate, and complete. But developing obedience in our children requires consistent training, which requires that we must be self-disciplined enough to consistently discipline our children.
3. Teach Your Children to Honor You
“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” Ephesians 6:2-3
“Daddy’s home!”
The window in the kitchen in our first house looked over three or four back yards to the street that crossed our street. As I walked down that street from the bus stop, Lynn could see me walk past the last yard. She would alert our three small children and start a stampede to the front door. The children would stop what they were doing and burst out the front door, jump off the porch and bolt up the sidewalk toward the corner, grinning and yelling “Daddy!”
It was the best part of my day. Welcoming hugs and kisses melted whatever stress had survived my commute, and as we walked back to the house I would hear the news of the day. Sometimes we raced back, often with the youngest on my back.
Sometimes the weather did not allow a quick rush up the street, and some days I drove rather than take the bus, but each day, whether I was still outside or had just come in the front door, she would call out, “Daddy’s home!” and it would echo through the tiny voices in our house accompanied by the rush of little feet. The welcome home hugs would be followed by a kiss from Lynn, and the evening began. This daily tradition continued until our youngest children were teenagers, and really didn’t stop until they had jobs of their own and weren’t home before me.
If you asked Lynn why she so enthusiastically encouraged our children to greet me, she would answer with one word: HONOR.
Someone drew our attention to this verse in Ephesians that refers to the fifth commandment in Exodus 20, and her application was simple: if she showed simple enthusiasm that Daddy was home, our children would learn it was important to honor me and her. It worked.
Our children learned honor from their mom’s daily example, and they still honor us now in their 20’s and 30’s. But it’s not just us, they honor their grandparents, they honor their pastors, and they honor their bosses.
God’s command to honor parents held the promise of long life, but He emphasizes honor throughout the Bible. In the Old Testament it is the same Hebrew word also translated as “glory;” in Isaiah 42:8 the Lord states that he will not share his glory (honor) with other gods.
In John’s gospel, Jesus states, “He who does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent Him,” (John 5:23). He later compares misplaced honor to true honor (John 5:41-44) and emphasized how He honored His Father and His Father honored Him (John 8:49,54).
As you teach your children to love God, remember to train them in obedience and honor, so they can serve Him throughout their long lives.
By His calling, in His strength,
Dean
*All Scripture quotations in this article are from the New King James Version (NKJV).
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